1. Why no-one can accept Harry could be, can be, IS a girls name too. From the Barista at Starbs to the man on the crepe stand at SGP. “What’s your name love? ” uhhh Harry “you mean Harriet? ” I don’t know DO I? Maybe you’d like to tell me what I want to order too, seeing as you can READ MY MIND…it’s 2014, what about gender neutral maaaan!
2. Three-quarter length jumpsuits. Talk about unflattering. Just no.
*sorry about the TERRIBLE picture quality, they’re SO ugly I couldn’t be bothered spending time finding large enough images.
3. Candy Crush. STOP SENDING ME REQUESTS!!!!!!!!
4. Why Sunderland AFC are consistently rubbish every season. Especially when they have the best fans in the world.
5. The use of words like ‘bare’ ‘gassed’ ‘bait’ and ‘badman’ by almost middle class white boys from the Home Counties.
6. What PPI is and why some arsehole keeps leaving me robotic voicemails about it.
7. That my mum didn’t force me to audition for the role of Hermoine aged eleven. Wild, frizzy hair? check. Precocious and pedantic? Check. Secretly in love with gingers*? CHECK. C’mon Sue, we could have been loaded by now!
*not a sneaky dig at the fact that all my boyfriend’s mates refer to him as “ginger bollocks”- no, not a sneaky dig at alllll.
8. How neknominate was ever a thing…and while we’re on the subject of fads remember Draw Something? What about planking? Chatroulette? *shudders with embarrassment*
9. People who don’t like tomatoes.
10. And women that have beauty regimes they stick to. I’m talking weekly manicures and regular cleansing.
11. Equally people who manage to eat ‘clean’ – my version of eating clean is having a doughnut and not getting jam on my top. Or a pasty and not getting pasty juice down my front. Seriously, there’s no enjoyment in plain chicken and a couple sprigs of broccoli.
12. Pretty much all of the answers in the numbers round on Countdown, Rachel Riley I am not.
13. Why the only reservation I can get at The Chiltern Firehouse is on a Monday at midday. Don’t you KNOW WHO I AM?
14. Why when I paint my nails white a la Alexa and Cara it ends up looking like I’ve done it with tippex.
15. That we don’t burst into song and musical skits like in the movies. Wouldn’t life be better if every other day there was the chance you’d be involved in a spontaneous rendition of Oom Pah Pah?
16. Speaking of which…why my head voice and actual voice don’t correlate. In my head I’m Mariah where as when I actually sing, I’m more likely to become a social pariah instead (WOAH, how’s that for a rhyme!).
17. Why I consistently stop myself spending a lot of money on one item because I deem it too expensive, then go and drop exactly the same amount of dollar on lots of less expensive things that I don’t like as much…and inevitably end up wearing once before giving away to someone else/charity.
18. Why page 3 still exists.
19. Why I’ve been buying bottles of wine when you can get two in one with this handy little bag…plus 90% less packaging – YOU’RE WELCOME ENVIRONMENT.
20.That glitter isn’t acceptable as everyday wear.
21. How Jess Glynn’s voice can be SO good. B.e.a.u.t.i.fullllll. Go and listen NOW.
22. Why Nike don’t make ALL their trainers in size 4 and up rather than size 5. Especially as small trainers look better.
23. And in other sizing news – why I’m a 10 in h&m, an 8 in Toppers and 6 in M&S and probably a 20 in Miss Selfridge – RIDICULOUS.
24. Family guy – eeeeesh!
25. Why I have to be a grown up and pay bills, save money, get a mortgage, work everyday doing something that isn’t blogging, looking at tumblr/pinterest, eating and/or sleeping.
What don’t you ‘Get’ at the moment?
Thanks for reading! 🙂